For a little bit this afternoon, I was so overwhelmed with my son, I wanted to leave him in the little exam room and take a walk. I didn't, because, well, that would be illegal and scary for Ben. Here's the backstory.
Daycare calls around 2:30 to tell me that Ben is running a fever, and he's just laying there, watching everyone and whimpering. So, I leave. Mamma to the rescue.
One look at my little guy, and I knew that we were taking a trip to the walk-in clinic. He was lethargic and barely reacted when I came in. His eyes were glazed over, and he started crying. So sad.
I had to make a decision. Where to take him? The Aspirus Urgent Care or the Clinic Walk-In. We were going to be changing pediatricians because we weren't happy with the clinic, but all of his medical records are at the clinic. So, I went there because I didn't want to have to try to recall his medical history all of a sudden.
We saw a doctor who diagnosed a major double ear infection (which is the reason he's been crying all week. oops). Because of Ben's wheezing, he also ordered a nebulizer treatment, a chest xray, and an RSV test.
I'll skip past the boring clinical crap and say this: It is very hard to try to entertain a sick toddler in a small exam room without any toys, books or bottles.
I pulled out all the stops. I made balloons with the gloves. We played drums with the tongue depressers. We built castles with the dixie cups. I played Near-Far with the mirror. I put the dixie cup on my nose and pretended to be a piggy. I sang songs. It was tough work.
After an hour, he didn't want to play. He just wanted to lay on Mamma and whimper. About 30 minutes into that part... me, holding a half-dressed toddler on an uncomfortable plastic chair, trying to find a comfortable position for myself while trying to find a comfortable position for him. And he was running a fever, so he was very warm against my body.
I started to have hot flashes and hyperventilate, so I'd alternate between putting him on the exam table and letting him scream and pacing back and forth, fanning myself. That's when I wanted to escape. I know it wasn't fun for Ben either, but hell, this isn't his blog.
Eventually, the hell ended. The nurse had Ben heave his chest just to get ox-sats above 92. I tried telling her that it wasn't acceptable to me to have them fudge my son's test results just so you wouldn't have to admit him. She said it didn't matter. Whatever.
The doctor came in and said his RSV test was negative and his x-ray looked fine. Therefore it is just a virus, and there's nothing they can do. He was about to leave when I reminded him to give me a prescription for the ear infections.
We left. Now my husband gets to take care of him, and I get to take a mommy break. Oh look. Here it is. That's why I'm blogging. So thank you, dear friends, for listening to my woes.